The Verdict

My last post elicited an enormous number of responses. Everyone had advice from, “I’ll support you in whatever you do,” to, “You should wait a while until the dust settles,” to, “Go now. Just go.”

I had a difficult night, tossing and turning. It was so bad I accidentally got my neck and arms tangled in the power cord of my alarm clock and yanked it from the wall (I sold my bed and am sleeping on the floor.) I woke up without having really slept, still jittery. Went in to work and couldn’t focus. Left work, drove around, dropped some things off at Goodwill. Went to the gym, lifted weights, ran, and, huffing and puffing, I remembered my time in Israel.

I remember when the Intifadah first broke out in 2000. It was right around Rosh Hashanah time so school was out and most of the overseas students had headed off to go touring in Europe. When the news broke on the major networks I received panicked phone calls from my fellow students from their vacation spots in France, Italy, wherever, asking me to go into their rooms, pack their bags, and put them on a shipping palate bound for New York. They weren’t even coming back to get their things. Almost none of the students returned to finish the semester. Of course, my first reaction was, “What a bunch of cowards.” But I had an even deeper sense of pity for them. It was as if something were lacking, some unfulfilled potential, a missed connection. Am I losing that connection now?

The decision is clear. I don’t want to miss my chance, to lose my connection, so I’m going without delay. And I feel more strongly about it now than I did a week ago. It pains me to see the situation in Israel today, but I’m not doing anything to help that situation by sitting here and waiting for someone else to make it all better.

Got back from my jog, washed up, came back to the office with a clear head, and checked my mail. There was an email waiting for me from the office manager.

My proposal to continue working for my company via telecommuting has been accepted! Hopefully I will, IY”H, be able to continue earning a living while re-building my connections there. So it’s full speed ahead!